I want to be like my mother

Reagan and her Mimi at Reagan's 2nd birthday party.

This post is in honor of my mother for Mother's Day...a few days early, I know, but I've gotta blog when I've got the time.

I was at Walmart with all 4 kiddos this morning. I only went because we were desperate. We were completely out of milk and bread. They actually cried this morning when I gave them water for breakfast. So, off to walmart we went. I got everyone in the basket and my phone rang. It was my mom. She said, "I went by your house to bring you donuts but you weren't home. They're on your front porch." I felt really bad that we missed her and mad that we ate Great Value poptarts instead of enjoying delicious donuts. But just smiled because that's my mom. Always performing random acts of kindness for people. She's hands down one of the most giving and encouraging people I know. Donuts on my front porch is just a tiny example of her thoughtfulness. No matter how busy she is she always makes time for me.

Growing up, I knew my mom always loved me more than anyone else in the world. But I wasn't aware of how much until I held my baby girl in my arms. I continue to think when I hold my babies, "So this is how much my mom loves me." And still my love for my children grows everyday...I can't imagine what my heart will feel 30 years from now. Knowing that love makes me love my own mother even more.

Lately I'm having a rough time sacrificing my sleep for my kids. Bennett's been cutting 3 molars at one time. We. have. not. been. sleeping. I "slept" on his floor last night for over an hour. Reagan still wakes up each night to go potty. Not sure if it's now a really bad habit or if her bladder actually does wake her up...every single night. I know it's just a season but I'm not the happiest girl when I don't have at least 6 hours. I want to have a good attitude and embrace the night time but my self-sacrificing heart just isn't there. But I know my mom did it willingly. I want to be like her in so many other ways too.

I still remember the feeling I had after a really bad day at school...Holding back tears all day long. Then, the moment I saw my mom and she hugged me, everything was right in the world. I probably let all those tears come right then but she just gave me peace that no other person could. Now I get to be that comforter for my children. I feel like I fail each day. I want to be like my mother.

I was painfully shy when I was a kid. My friends at Harding helped me out of that but in high school I let my insecurities get the best of me. My mom was my best friend during those rough years. She always told me, "I'm your biggest cheerleader." And she really was. But not only did she cheer me on through high school, she prayed me through it as well. I know her prayers were answered because I survived high school and am now I'm married to a wonderful Christian man, have 2 beautiful healthy kids, and I live 6 miles from her and my dad...definitely an answered prayer that my mom prayed. ;) I want to pray for my children just like my mom prayed for us.

I love my daughter's face when she sees my mother. And Bennett's starting to get the same excited smile. She just a has a way with people. Not only children but everyone that meets her. I'm so proud to call her my mom. I want to be like her in so many ways.